By MidLyfe Editor: There’s a theme to approaching, entering and being in the second half of one’s life. And when you read about it in magazines, newspapers and lifestyle websites, having a marvellous midlife all sounds quite easy to do. This assumes, of course, that you have the circumstances to do them in the first place, which of course, many people don’t. However, there are many things you can do, from tweaking at the margins of something you already do – to trying something completely new. Generally speaking, we know that when we reach this new magical age – to make it magical, we need to eat well and keep fit and we’ve got that message.

Eating well and keeping fit are important, of course, they are – but there are other aspects of our lives that we need to ensure to keep us motivated, positive and energised and achieve that marvellous midlife we really want. The examples below come from a distillation of articles littered all over the internet and broadly, they say something – usually in a more complicated manner than necessary.

Don’t get stuck in a rut

Shake things up a bit. Is there something you always wanted to do? Launch a small home business, write an e-book, train for a half marathon, learn a new skill or perhaps do some charity work.

Midlife is a special time. We should have the confidence to take a small risk, embrace a bit of change and do something we’ve never tried before. Even pursuing an interest or a passion we may have abandoned some years ago or an ambition we always meant to fulfil no matter how small.

It isn’t necessary that you make a huge profit from a small home business – more that you get pleasure from doing it – and if you make a small amount of money from it, all the better. In other words, what would you pay for a boost of self-esteem or the pleasure you get from helping someone else?

This is your chance to take another bite from the cherry. And if you do – make sure you choose well, because it may well have a really positive impact on your life.

 

 

Friends, family and old acquaintances

We all know that having a reasonably wide circle of friends will help your wellbeing in midlife. But did you know that whilst friends are equally important to men and women – family matters more for men’s well-being than it does for women.

Research published in the BMJ says the following: “People with larger social networks are known to have better well-being; however, little is known about the association with socio-demographic factors that may predict the size and composition of social networks and whether the association with well-being is independent of pre-existing psychological health or socio-demographic factors.” The research subsequently concluded that -“Having a well-integrated friendship network is a source of psychological well-being among middle-aged adults, while kinship networks appear to be more important for men’s well-being than for women’s. These relationships are independent of education, material status and prior psychological health.”

There’s another thing to consider here that has not been mentioned. If children have flown the nest – or not far from it, or perhaps trying to repair the wounds of broken family ties is a stretch too far – then reconnecting with old acquaintances may be something to consider. If not, try joining a local group. In my local town, there’s a breakfast club, 17 lunch clubs, a speakers club, books, craft and sports clubs – all manner of interesting things we can do to meet people with mutual interests.

 

Look on the bright side

Right now there’s a lot going on in the world that is frankly a bit depressing, which could bog down a positive mindset. In addition, being in midlife can present a few other problems we might not have experienced when we’re younger such as bereavement, relationship failure to ill-health or money worries. It’s easy to go into a tailspin and give up on the things we have done to make life better – but all the evidence says taking action and keeping control will keep us in a more positive mood and this is vital for our long-term mental health and well-being.

For instance, if the economic news is really bad and that worries you, have a look at all the economic recessions we’ve had in the last 200 years. Some have been shockers. In fact, since you’ve been alive, there’s been one every decade and they were all dreadful … on paper. But just how bad were they to you personally? And what does this say other than, recessions come and go – that’s capitalism, it’s the way it works. One thing we do know, no matter how bad they’ve been, they’ve always been replaced with longer periods of growth. To be precise, we’ve collectively had 5.5 years of recessions (66 months) in the last 50 years ( 600 months) in Britain.

Worrying about things that you can’t do anything about is nothing but wasted energy and it drains your ability to keep positive and energetic.

We are hard-wired to see things that might do us harm – but in today’s world, we should not allow this hard-wiring – designed to stop us from being eaten by predators or beaten by rivals to take control. In other words, if you look for the bright side, there is one. Having a sense of perspective is one of the great benefits of being in middle age and beyond, so it’s important to use this experience to your advantage.

 

Look outwards

One thing many of us could do is to give something back to the society that gave us a chance to do reasonably well in life. Volunteering is one great way that shifts your focus from your own life to that of others who could do with a helping hand. According to the Mental Health Foundation: “Volunteering is a great way to do something for others and research shows that it benefits people of all ages through increasing feelings of self-esteem, respect, motivation and wellbeing.” There are plenty of organisations that need volunteers in your local area and it’s a great way to share skills and perhaps gain some on the way: from local libraries and schools to Age UK – there will be plenty to choose from.

 

Look inwards

It is just as important to ensure you look after yourself. If there’s something niggling you with regards to your health, get it checked out straight away. Often, when you suspect something is wrong and then think the worst, it will delay you from investigating. The easiest way is to check it out and deal with it ASAP.

In terms of everyday life, even doing something you already do, but in a different way can make a difference. We now know that being physically fit in midlife has been scientifically proven to be one of the ways to lower your risk of dementia and other health problems such as heart disease. Instead of going to the gym, or walking – why not try a session or two of Yoga, Pilates or even high-intensity interval training or HIIT. You could start off with many of the online sessions from personal trainers or enquire at your local gym. One of these sessions might catch on and stick.

 

Conclusion

Being on a treadmill is not good for anyone. Making even small modifications can make a big difference to the humdrum of life. But seeking out better ways of doing things, learning something new or giving back to society and having a good sense of perspective are the keys to building a marvellous midlife, just as keeping good relationships or building new ones is.